There are four major truths to becoming a CEO that no one really prepares you for beforehand.
I was recently speaking with a CEO who had just stepped into the role—60 days in. Eyes wide, heart open, and already feeling the weight of it all. As we spoke, I found myself telling her what no one really talks about before you take the seat. Elements I wish more leaders heard out loud. What’s not in an onboarding deck, book or press release.
Given the current trend of record-breaking CEO turnover, which also means a record number of new CEOs, it’s imperative to set new CEOs up for success and longevity.
One way to do this is to increase awareness of these four elements. It helps CEOs know what they are stepping into and ensuring they have the resources to sustain the role. Understanding what to look out for reduces the shock to a CEO’s system and ensures CEOs are more effective from the beginning. Ultimately, it allows them to own the intensity without as much surprise.
Here’s what I shared:
1.You are now in the spotlight
The moment you become a CEO, you stop being seen solely as an individual. You start being experienced as a symbol, system, signal. You may feel like the same person—humble, grounded, collaborative—but your role now carries meaning far beyond your intentions.
You are always in the spotlight. Your words carry enormous weight. Your silences will echo. You may feel surprised at how your presence shifts a room. Stepping into a CEO role can feel disorienting at first especially if you pride yourself on being “one of the team.”
Recognize: Part of stepping into the role is learning to hold the gravity of what you now represent, without letting it disconnect you from who you are.
2. You will need help
This role is intense, personally and professionally. The complexity, pace, scrutiny, and visibility can be dizzying.
You will need support. Not just a strong executive team, but people who can support you as a human being. You will need a personal board of directors: those who can help you think, feel, recover and recalibrate. And you’ll need to lean on people who can help you in your personal life to make things as seamless as possible.
Recognize: Where you spend your energy matters more now than ever. The strongest leaders I know are the ones who build a circle of support around themselves and actually let them in.
3. Transformation takes longer than you think
If you’re stepping into a role that requires transformation, know this: you’ll keep uncovering problems for a while. Longer than feels fair. It’s like buying a fixer-upper. You start by addressing one issue. Then, you’ll find cracks in the foundation, faulty wiring and water damage behind the walls. It’s frustrating and exhausting. But it’s also necessary.
Real change means first seeing what’s broken. Your job is to stay steady. To stabilize where you can while holding a bold vision for what’s next. You’ll have moments where you want to move faster than the system can handle. Sometimes you’ll need to push. Other times, you’ll need to wait. The art of leadership is knowing when to push and when to pause.
Recognize: True transformation takes an average of three years. Be in it for the long-term. Hold the vision, create a roadmap and recognize the balance of when you need to push versus wait.
4. This job is hard and lonely; prioritize your well-being
People don’t talk enough about the loneliness at the top. Or the way the job can start to erode your sense of self if you’re not careful. You’re always “on.” You’re carrying an enormous amount you can’t share. And you’re often putting others’ needs ahead of your own.
That’s why your well-being isn’t just a personal matter—it’s a leadership imperative. Tend to the relationships that nourish you. Protect your joy. Make space for movement, music, rest and laughter. If you neglect your well-being, the role will consume you more than you realize, until the pressure becomes crushing.
Recognize: You won’t operate at your highest leadership capacity without first focusing on your well-being. You must prioritize taking care of yourself first, no one will do it for you.
Where to Start: Actively Identify a Personal Board of Directors
Your personal board of directors are people outside the organization you can turn to for advice. They are both personal and professional people you can lean on when you need. Professional examples include:
- CEOs at other organizations
- Experts in different areas you need help with
- People who can be a sounding board on a regular basis
Identifying the people and making sure you cultivate these relationships can be an important step as you take on the CEO role.
If you’re in your first 60 days, or even your 600th, know this: you’re not alone.
There’s no perfect way to lead. If you:
- Stay grounded in who you are while growing into who the role requires you to be
- Hold both steadiness and vision
- Ask for help when you need if
- Protect the parts of you that make this work meaningful
You’ll not only survive, you’ll build something enduring.
Because at the end of the day, leadership isn’t about having all the answers.
It’s about having the courage to keep showing up: present, purposeful, and anchored in what matters most.
